Ever been in conversation with someone, especially a leader, and they are physically with you but not really “with you?” When I ask folks in workshops how they feel in that circumstance they consistently say unimportant and not valued. And yet, how often do we as leaders do that? Guilty as charged! The constant distractions, strong drive to multi-task, desire to be available for others, and working remotely exacerbates challenges to presence and listening.

We’ve also developed patterns of listening for purposes that are largely unconscious to us. For example, we may listen to be right or win, rehearse our response, identify with others, and many more – all of which block our ability to truly listen.

Listening starts with an intention to be present, to listen, and an awareness of what might block us. When we get distracted, because we invariably will, release the distraction, and return our focus to the speaker – over and over again. Conscious leaders also acknowledge when they aren’t able to be present for someone, even in the moment, and request to schedule a time when they can.

We’ve experienced great leaders are great listeners. Listening with presence builds relationships, produces clarity, supports development, prevents misunderstandings, reduces conflict, and ultimately saves us time.